A journalist friend in his forties recently confided in me that in the few months since he was diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), instead of feeling discouraged, he feels better. “Some pieces of the puzzle,” he claimed, “fell into place and I finally understood why I was having problems at work.”
At the same time, one of the gym employees asked me for advice about her 35-year-old partner who had recently discovered that he had an autism spectrum disorder and didn’t know how to deal with it. “Is it necessary for him to start psychotherapy?” she asked me anxiously. “Should he tell his family or is it better to keep the diagnosis a secret forever?” she continued, apparently considering the social stigma.
These are just two of the many examples of similar incidents that have come to my attention in the last year. Perhaps most of us have noticed that more and more often people approaching or already in middle age are being diagnosed with dyslexia, behavioral disorders, or neurodevelopmental disorders, such as autism or ADHD.
What may seem strange is that these are people who have remained undiagnosed for decades for disorders that are usually identified in the first years of a person's school life.
What could this mean? Is the diagnosis they are currently receiving wrong and the result of manipulative, unethical behavior by some so-called "expert" who is trying to exploit them financially? Or are they exaggerating or lying themselves, in order to gain our favor or to justify the antisocial and unusual behaviors that generally characterize them? And has it finally become fashionable to diagnose any kind of difference, as some argue?
None of this is necessarily true.
Many problems that afflict people in their 40s or 50s had gone undiagnosed – the same is true for people with serious mental illnesses – due to their parents' limited knowledge or even their refusal to face reality, which often led them to conclude that their children were simply lazy or "not getting their lessons."
The taboos that until recently prevailed in our country for people with learning disabilities or autism, of course, did not help. Parents and teachers in many cases did not bother to seek help, while the children were young or when they were going through their adolescence. Today's adults who had remained without a diagnosis are coming to correct this injustice.
Nowadays, middle-aged people have greater education and easier access to information than their parents, and they have a fair demand to understand what is happening to them so that whatever situation is afflicting them can be given a specific name.
These may be creative individuals, highly trained in their field, but who feel that something is wrong, that something is preventing them from developing their full potential or from creating functional, stable friendships and romantic relationships.
They often search for information online about their condition, and when they do visit specialists' offices – unlike adolescents or the very young – they largely know how to talk about what they are experiencing and how to describe their symptoms.
More and more people are speaking freely about their experiences, having realized that they are not responsible for their difference.
In our time, learning disabilities and neurodiversity are no longer taboo. More and more people are speaking freely about their experiences, visiting psychologists' offices so that they can keep their condition under control, having realized that they are not responsible for their difference.
Care must be taken, of course, so that adults who have received a relevant diagnosis do not fall into the trap of attributing any bad habits and weaknesses to the fact that they are neurodifferent or suffer from some behavioral disorder, demanding that others not only understand them, but also constantly justify and forgive them for everything they do.
On the other hand, there are those who identify the person with their diagnosis, unable to see anything else, positive or negative, about them, resulting in them treating them as if they lack the ability to take care of themselves, take initiatives, or make important decisions about their daily lives.
And let's not forget the danger of self-diagnosis for those who spend hours on the computer trying to discover what they are suffering from and, without seeking the advice of experts, reach incorrect conclusions by placing a label on themselves or someone close to them that does not suit them.
Furthermore, the internet's overabundance of information, which often turns into misinformation, can cause confusion in some people, leading them to seek medical help for anything in their body, behavior, or way of thinking that seems to be operating outside the ordinary.
However, despite the dangers that lurk, it is undoubtedly important that nowadays people have stopped suffering in silence, pretending, spending their lives trying to imitate something they are not, just to stay within the norm, to satisfy the expectations of those close to them.
It is particularly positive that most people no longer view science with reservations, doctors and mental health specialists in a competitive manner, as was the case in previous generations – and above all, that they take responsibility for their actions by seeking solutions, without constantly fearing what others will say.
photo whitedaemon, https://pixabay.com
