Unknown to each other, we decided to meet.
Initially, a quiet awkwardness accompanied me. I felt hesitation, a doubt about “how I would cope.” The motivation, the need for connection and meaningful communication, overcame.
With interest and moderation, our beloved speaker "laid the carpet" that hosted the group. Her presence was essential, like a wise companion.
I listened to what was said with respect and listened to what might have been said. not were said. The moment it became clear to me that we are all, more or less, struggling with the same existential issues, was liberating.
In this common place, we stood to rest together, in company. At a crossroads, almost archetypal, in our modern everyday life. I still feel the strong grip of Dimitris' hand, of the invisible hand of all of the group. A group photo captures the moment. And perhaps the energy that emerges and flows within this embrace? I certainly felt it. And I am grateful for it. I trusted, I brought my vulnerable sides to the surface, like the sensitive skin of a baby.
It's not (only) what I learned. It's mainly the ones that I felt. The connection, the peace, the energy in space and time, the relief and certainty that I was where I was supposed to be. The miraculous sharing…
I sighed, listening to the Moiroloi. On white paper, I drew. I kneaded the pliable clay in my palms and fingers. I smelled it. I closed my eyes and surrendered to my senses, to my body.
We are no longer strangers. We have shared. We have given time and space to the silences, to the sensations, to the emotions that have emerged and been released. A deep sense of bliss fills my chest.
Awareness was experienced, for me personally, like childbirth. Painful and laborious, but also with precious gifts. With rebirth. We gain something, we lose something, by definition.
Weeks have passed. A full emotion and joy, emerges within me even now, as I write. A pervasive sense of gratitude and completeness. I belong. And in a way that I cannot, that perhaps does not even matter to describe in words, I love and accept myself, I love life.
(text published in the newspaper of shape Foundation Athens, regarding attending a seminar "Death as an integral truth of our lives")
photo protooleh, Image license by freepik.com
